Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Black White & Green # 3

 By Mark Rodriguez

This anthology series throws in random stories involving the Ninja Turtles based on different versions of them or just an original take. The title comes from the fact that the entire comic is drawn in black and white... and green. Let's see what stories we get this time.

"The Beast that Bleeds Green" starts with Turtles following the trail of some sort of monster in the sewers. Since they're looking for has lost a lot of blood, the Turtles figure it couldn't have gotten far. It seems to be mutant, but it's not one on Donatello's files. Michaelangelo mentions the monster bite through one of his nunchucks. The trail is green and Donatello says the monster is bleeding mutagen. 

Leonardo asks if everything that touches the blood will mutate. Donatello isn't sure to what degree. Leonardo says they could be on a verge of a mutant outbreak. A sewer rat drinks some of the mutagen and grows in size. The Turtles fight off the rat and continue on their way. Donatello's scanner was broken during the fight, and Leonardo says they'll just follow the trail.

Suddenly the humanoid monster runs past the Turtles, knocking them down. The monster climbs down a ladder and the Turtles give chase. They see that they are now in Stockman Labs which has several caged animals. With the mutant there, still bleeding mutagen, Donatello says they're not in a good place to fight.

Leonardo tries to reason with the monster, seeing as they're all mutants. The mutant starts to talk as it's revealed it has a bomb strapped to its chest. He says he has a purpose, unlike the Turtles, which was given to him by Shredder and Stockman. He was given a single task, which was to lead the Turtles to this area. The mutant activate the bomb and the Turtles run for it. The monster says it feels good to fulfill its purpose as it explodes. 

The Turtles make it to safety, and the explosion sprays mutagen everywhere. The Turtles watch as several mutated animals, like frogs, lions, bears and other things all run out of the lab and into the sewers. The Turtles don't have much to say except 'cowabunga?'.

"Sin Sewer" opens with a woman named Esmeralda who contacted Raphael to help her find her sister Jade. Their parents kept them confined, and while Esmeralda escaped, Jade was put in a prison. Raphael narrates that Esmeralda was looking for the Turtles for a long time, leaving messages in the sewers until Raph found them. Raph says Esmeralda's family controls the infrastructure of 'bigger lowlifes' while they live a life of luxury. Esmeralda has heard stories about the Turtles and asks if he will help save her sister. Raphael gladly takes this mission. 

Raphael found the prison. Imagining what would it be like if his brothers were stuck there made him do something that Master Splinter begged him to never do, lead by anger. Raphael fought his way through the guards, not caring who they were or why they were doing this. Raph only knew them as monsters holding a girl captive. 

Suddenly a larger guard shows up and he punches the turtle to the ground. Raph narrates that's Splinter told them that their weapons didn't define them, they were tools to direct their skill and strength into. Raphael says he didn't have the skill of his brothers, but he always had the most strength. Raphael flips around and overpowers the man, knocking him out.

Raphael has defeated everyone and opens the door to find Jade but he sees Esmeralda and some others stealing jewelry. Esmeralda explains she has no sister and only wanted to collect her inheritance early. Esmeralda knew Raph would fight the 'bad people' while her crew stole the jewels. She had heard that Raphael was 'the proud angry one'. Raphael realizes the people he tore up were just regular guards doing their job. The thief says her father's insurance can cover it but if he feels so bad he can give the men part of his cut.  Raph realizes he was played, and Esmeralda says he played his part well. She says Raphael was meant to be bruiser and they'll be at the air field not far from there.

Raphael says Esmeralda fed him a story he wanted to be a part of, where things were black and white and he was the good guy. Raph says he acted like the tough guy, but tough guys end up alone. He says he's part of a family and clan, and now he needs his clan to help him clean up his mess. He asks his family for help.

Esmeralda and the rest prepare to escape by plane. She sees Raph and asks if he's coming and going. Raph says he was thinking of joining and he needs someone smart to tell him what to hit. She says that's flattering. Raph says she gets credit for playing on his insecurities, but she expected him to be too embarrassed to own up to them. The rest of the Turtles arrive and beat up the crew. The thieves are tied up, and Esmeralda says Raph will pay for this with interest. Raph says he'll be ready, since he won't have to shoulder his burdens alone anymore.

'Miami Vacation' opens with the Turtles are relaxing on South Beach, Miami as Donatello tells the others about one of the local delicacies called chicharron, which is apparently better than pizza. Raphael tells the other to hush up since they're on vacation and he's trying to sleep. Michealangelo heads off to find some chicharron.

Michealangelo walks along the beach singing about chicharron, scaring off the locals, forgetting that he's a human-sized Turtle. Mikey finds a place called 'Las Casa de Chicarron' and steps inside. He sees that Leatherhead is robbing the place, scaring the 'abuela' that runs it. This version of Leatherhead speaks Spanish has has a machete replacing his right hand. 

The mutants take it outside and Mikey asks Leatherhead how he could threaten that 'abuela'. Leatherhead she's a human so it doesn't matter. Humans have always treated him badly and called him swamp trash. Mikey says he has human friends and humans are alright. As they fight, Mikey kicks Leatherhead towards a motorcycle. Leatherhead grabs the bike and tosses it towards the Turtle. 

Leatherhead is horrified as he sees the bike fly over Mikey and headed towards a mother holding her child. Mikey backflips in front of the mother and kicks the bike to bits. The mother and other people surround Michealangelo and thank him. Leatherhead is confused that they're so nice to him. Mikey offers Leatherhead to grab some chicharron and hang out with his brothers.

Later on the Turtles are hanging out with Leatherhead (now using a pizza slicer instead of a machete) as they have some pizza and chicharron. Meanwhile, the 'abuela' wonders what happened to her motorbike.

"Green Means Go" starts with the Turtles and April in their van as the traffic light finally hits green. The Turtles are in a hurry and April tells them they should slow down once in a while. Raph says everything they slow down the city throws something new at them. Just then a car speeds past them as dollar bills fall out of it. The car crashes into the van as it goes past, bumping into any car in its way. April says that no one endangers her van and gets away with it and drives after the Mouser-Themed vehicle.

Sure enough Baxter Stockman is driving the car with stolen loot, and once he notices that the Turtles are after him, he sends his Mousers out to attack. The Turtles get on top of the van and fighting off the robots. As they fight they notice the Mousers have green lights on the little visor they usually have. Donatello doubts it's just for style.

April tells the others that she can't keep up with Baxter, because every time he's at a red light it turns green for him. Donatello tells April to keep her eyes on the road as he got this. Donatello works on one of the Mousers and figures out that Baxter wired them with a signal to reprogram the traffic lights. When Baxter drives through an intersection, the lights on all sides turn green to match the Mousers.

Donatello manages to turn off the signal. The Turtles leap off the van and land on top of Baxter's Mouser-Mobile, causing him to crash into a post. Leonardo tells Baxter that he can benefit from slowing down once in a while. Michealangelo asks if they can keep some of the money for pizza, and Leo says no.

My thoughts-

A lot of thoughts with this one. Especially that Miami story. The first story suffered from the fast-paced limited page nature of these stories. The Turtles confront the mutant, and it immediately blows itself up before we get a decent fight scene or more backstory on the creature. Then the explosion creates a bunch of mutant animals that just run into the sewers and the Turtles are pretty much like 'well... that just happened' instead chasing after them. It's similar to the last issue's story with the mutated Bobby Viper and a giant mutated hydra escaping in the sewers while Mikey and Casey act like 'oh well, not our problem'.... except for the fact that Turtles live in the sewers.

The story with Raphael working with Esmeralda is a good insight in Raph's anger. It also points a finger at all the times the Turtles and other heroes hack and slash security guards who are sometimes not really evil, but just doing their jobs. After years in New York, I'd imagine some people would hear stories or know of the existence of giant turtle-people living in the sewers... but how would Esmeralda know Raph is the proud and angry one. She left clues in the sewer, what if one of the other Turtles showed up instead, or if all four of them did? I still like the overall idea of the story with a crafty woman able to trick a do-gooder into doing the dirty work for her.

As for the Miami story, there's quite a bit to say. First they missed the perfect chance to say the Turtles spent their vacation at Key West, Florida as a callback to TMNT III The Manhattan Project.

One thing I am curious about, and this only someone from Miami can answer, is if chicharrones are really that big a deal over there? Now we're talking about the local bag of pork rinds you get in the store. These are pork rinds, but while they're still fried and fresh off the skillet. I remember having them a few times back in Mexico, but it never gave me the impression that were a 'big deal'. The dish is tasty, but I guess mileage can vary if you think it's better than pizza. If these were the 80's Turtles, Michealangelo would definitely want to put some on his pizza.

Another thing to point out is that store said 'Bueno Barato Bonito' which is a common thing for anyone selling things to say in Mexico, whether it being a store owner or a salesman of some sort. It's out of order though, as it should be 'Bueno, Bonito y Barato' which means 'good, beautiful and cheap'. It's pretty much used the same way a salesman would say 'it's a real steal', 'we're practically giving it away' and other such catchy phrases while delivering your sales pitch.

Of course the major thing is the usually-Canjun Leatherhead now being a Hispanic variant of the character. Not only does he speak Spanish, he also has an attachment replacing his hand that can used to attach a machete and a pizza cutter. Now for those that want to say 'well... actually...', the character was never called Leatherhead in the story, but for all intents and purposes, c'mon... it's Leatherhead. He just traded in his gumbo for some chicharrones. This version wasn't really a bad guy, he was just lashing out over how poorly the humans treated him. Despite his hatred for humans, he still felt bad when he nearly killed an innocent woman and child.

The art for this story however.... it was art. It was ok, for a stylized look in the first pages but then became 'who let their kid draw in their place' later on. 

The final story was fun, though their wasn't much to it. It was great to see the Mousers again, and the story had the best non-stylized art of the four. It's worth bringing up that April's van was the exact same one seen in the Mirage comics and the first 90's live action movie.

Let's see what happens with the next collection of Turtle Tales next issue. I understand that these are all short stand-alone stories, but with some changes, the first story could have been a continuation of the one from last issue. Just make the mutant Bobby Viper and say the Viper Boys were working for Shredder, and then maybe make another story next issue dealing with the Turtles chasing after the mutant animals. I mean, one of them was pretty much an overgrown spider. Like dude. You just don't let an overgrown spider run around. Especially one that looks like a real spider and not more cartoonish Spider Bytes. I also noticed that other than mentions, Master Splinter wasn't in any of these stories this time around.